Wednesday, August 22, 2007

acknowledging that we stand on the shoulders of giants, dear leader hereby announces that the second central party congress has unanimously lifted the term limit restrictions which would have called for open elections for the leadership of the racing union.  as a result, it is likely that he will run unopposed to another glorious victory for the people.  we would urge that all responsible cyclists exhibit the utmost caution towards critics who would claim that this is something other than a resounding confirmation of the wisdom of the vanguard and the central party, and a sweeping endorsement for the ideals of the union.  these criticisms ring hollow and carry a whiff of capitulation to forces that would bind us to a continuing yoke of oppression.  now is the time to be vigilant.  our common enemy, still aggressive and dangerous, is the culture of the hated four-wheeled hegemon.  we must not look inward, creating strife, but accept this and move on to our stated goals. 

8/22/2007 8:00:09 AM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)  #    Disclaimer  |  Comments [1]  | 
8/22/2007 3:01:23 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)
Oh, reelected by popular acclaim? That's what they all say.

And so it begins. What next... sending Josh to reeducation camp, to smooth out his spin and unlearn that clumsy pedal mashing? Exiling Kevin to NCVC for failure to exhibit proper revolutionary ardor? Sending Chris back to Lanterne Rouge just because you can?

This is how the spirit of the revolution dies, people! Will you stand up for revolutionary values and vote? Take it to the streets, at a minimum - I recommend a bicycle demonstration, preferably Hains Point tomorrow at noon, if you are going to demand your rights. Better wear NCVC, DC Velo and Squadra Coppi kit, and the gear of other local bike clubs - wouldn't want the maximum leader's agents to be able to identify you. Anybody I see out there in one of those jerseys, I'll interpret as a protest against this arbitrary seizure of the reins of power.
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