mike r-p and i were discussing a list of insults which can be shouted when you, as a cyclist, are wronged by a motorist. of course, shouting revolutionary slogans is probably preferable. this list is taken from howard tomb, wicked french for the traveler (1989: workman publishing, ny). certain gestures with these insults may also be useful, and all these should be used with care (and not in the rare occasion when it is actually the cyclist at fault). the motorist may not hear you – or understand what you’re saying – but it sure might make you feel better (i know i found fifth insult quite apropos the other day when some guy in an SUV was riding my back wheel down 14th street!)
hey! get a license, grandpa!
hé! va apprendre à counduire, pépé!
ay! vah ah-prawn-druh ah con-dweer, pay-pay!
move that worthless heap off the road!
Ôte ce tas de férraile de la circulation!
ote suh tah duh fair-eye duh, lah seer-kÿ-lass yon!
which are you? blind? or blind drunk?
quoi? t'es aveugle? ou complètement bourré?
kwah? tay ah-vuh-gluh? po como-plett-mahn boo-ray?
open your eyes, imbecile!
ouvre les yeux, imbécile!
oo-veruh lay-zyuh, am-bay-seel!
get off my tail, garlic head!
cesse de me filer le train, trounche d'aïl!
sess duh muh fee-lay luh train, tronsh day-yee!
your mother is belgian!
ta mère est belge!
tah mare ay beljh!
s'en allez ou je vous vais taquinir une autre fois!
go away or I will taunt you a second time!
posted by chris