I write this post to you all to let you know despite comrade Chuega’s claims that the ACAP GP has scattered for the cover of our off shore supporters the Council still remains incognito within the ranks of Dear Leaders own command bunker. There has been a bit of sniffing around but luckily we early on managed to fool the rest of the Union into believing those decoys placed around the compound in seer-sucker suits and ray bans where the force of the council.

 

At this point we are very close to a break through against DL and his oppressive regime. The chemicals we have gradual released into his personal air supply has begun it’s work; just this morning I witnessed blood coming from his nose and the watery, red eyes that mean the chemicals have begun their work on the old mans body. It should only be a matter of days, if not hours before DL will be left helpless to defend himself and his regime.

 

Things are quite tight here now so I must keep this short. Remember, God will carry us through this as if on eagles’ wings and the people will be free for once and for all. Long live the American counsel for the advancement and procurement of goods for the people™ (aka… capitalism)!

 

 

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 613 of the revolution, 21:07h, guard complex, north perimeter of the plaza de la revolucion.

i just got back from a personal audience with maximum leader.  my report was simple.  the people's liberation front and the marxist leninist liberation front have been driven underground and have not been heard from since friday.  we suspect they have scattered amongst the hills and will likely be sheltered by the clergy, at least in the short term.  they cannot be broken if they cannot be caught, but if victory for them is hiding in some poor campesino's root cellar to keep their counter-revolution going, then huzzah for them, let them have endless victory in the root cellar.

the capitalists have also gone underground.  we had intelligence of them fleeing en masse to the u.s. embassy and the central port where various multinational industries got them off shore and onto container ships.  good riddance, though speaking as a military man, i'd take enemies like that any day.  too laughable to be dangerous, except to themselves.  they will undoubtedly run home with their tales between their legs and tell the important politicians that some great bogeyman is interfering with "the trade".  that always seems to precede people getting hurt, but we'll need to deal with the headache later.  the port's still open and operating so it's not like the 101st airborne will be parachuting in.

la societe and the anarchists are a different story.  we have no progress on that front.  the anarchists started smashing storefronts and looting.  their destruction is so random that it's difficult to stay ahead of.  you can't plan for it or control it, you can only cordon them off in a vague sense and seek to limit the damage.  la societe is a question mark.  they have covered their tracks very well.  i have all my resources on the street focused on them, not so much for action as to get an understadning of their true motives and goals.  capitalization?!  please...  this is likely about power or money or privledge.  we'll know soon enough.

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 612 of the revolution, 23:30h, racing union command bunker.

 

my sources dragged in a kid and a laptop.  he was all set to post some screed to the web portal when our phone tap caught him.  they yanked him out of the basement so fast he didn't know what hit him.  he was a wreck, and i don't mean because the security detail "tenderized" him.  he was equal parts stupid defiance and abject terror.  i tried to calm him down and ask him questions but he seemed convinced that talking was a bad option.  so i laid it out in a clear and lucid manner for him.  the whole pretentious, coffee house intellectual, goatee wearing revolutionary thing has been done.  and it went exactly nowhere.  and now, you're a very small person incarcerated in a very large and scary facility.  at this point, you have two, and only two, options.  you can tell us everything we want to know, at which point you may return to your family knowing that we are monitoring you and them, forget revolution and do something productive, or you can have the information extracted from you forcibly, and this will come with a very high price.  he got indignant, and did a really nice soliloquy on my oppressive tactics.  i never get tired of lectures from sanctimonious revolutionaries trying to run it down for me.  i've probably heard that speech several hundred times and i'm always amused.  after that, we "tenderized" him for about ten minutes.  at this point, he had an epiphany about where he really was at this point in his life and what his options were.  and he decided, on his own, smart boy, that he wanted to make a contribution to our maintenance of an orderly society.  hasta la victoria siempre...

he wasn't part of one of the established groups that is constantly posting nonsense, but appears to be some sort of basement job with a permanent hard on for the little lenin library.  i was obviously mistaken about how serious a threat these people are.  they are a joke.  we should simply parade this one with his laptop and no pants through the streets so people get some sort fo idea what these revolutionaries really are.  dear leader's restaint on this matter was prescient.  he continues to impress me, and is likely either the wisest revolutionary in 300 years or the luckiest despot in the history of mankind.  we should have two of these groups in leg shackles by lunch tomorrow.

The age of Dear Leader and the chaos (anarchy!) he has birthed upon the Union struggles now with its last death throes, muttering to itself one nonsensical utterance after another, leaving the path for the new order of truths to open and blossom in an episteme of cycling. As our consciousness shifts from one point to another, we are again guided by the simple beauty and grace of words reflecting meaning, meaning embodied in language, language shared among brothers, and brothers sharing words, all with simple illocutionary acts. Acts supported by mere capitals!

You may ask, "But must we start a revolution all over again?" The inevitable answer is "Mais oui, sans pitié!"

The pretenders are many. The MLLFRWU's beginnings were promising, but their moral barrenness reveals itself in their openly nihilistic writings proclaiming the meaninglessness and absence of content of creation The [N]ew [V]elo [A]narcho-[S]yndicalists are the newest aspirants for cycling domination, now engaged in resurrecting the theory and practice of absolute and immediate incomprehensibility to large masses of people. The ACAP GP, as others have rightly (and righteously) criticized, is perhaps the last rampart of the bourgeoisie. And the Unholy Rouleur, pecking at the table scraps left over, has no fear of the gaping abyss which separates him from the spiritual life of the people.

Despite these obstacles, The People's revolution rolls forth, and the hatemongers and all their angels cannot prevail against it. Our statement here, our enunciated "speech acts", weave a network of conditions required for continued existence and the search for truth in the wheel. You cannot change the natural evolution of society by a command; you may make a resolution to write only what everybody likes, but you cannot force real revolutionaries to descend to the lowest possible standards to give up morals, character, and sincerity, to avoid capitalization and punctuation. Our power is created and transferred throughout an economy of discourse not race reimbursements, coasting not only through conduits of dialog, but through our very streets!

La Société

statement by the new velo anarcho-syndicalists:

true freedom doesn't flow from a manifesto, and it sure as hell doesn't flow from the words or actions of leaders, elected or otherwise.  if you want change, you must make change.  this is so simple, it's sort of curious that it's so often overlooked.  if you want something new, you make something new.  social structures have tremendous inertia and change is difficult.  one who studies physics comes to understand the tremendous amount of energy input that is required to alter the inertia of a large stationary object or system.  we draw from this example, and indicate that we will bring a huge, raw amount of energy to change the social status quo.

we are told, by people who are considered moderate and reasonable, that politely advocating a change of course, and then politlely sitting around and waiting for legislators to make our lives easier is the proper course of action.  we are done with this.  the roads are entirely too dangerous for cylists.  we need change now, and we are prepared to cause change. 

some may be unhappy with the pressures that will be brought to bear in order to produce change.  that's fine.  many are unhappy now, with the current means of production and with the current propogation of a serfdom-like system revolving around credit and debt.  many workers, literally chained to work through financial instruments of bondage, are unable to ever work beyond the need for work.  so think of what's coming as a shift in terms of who is going to be unhappy.

direct action starts very shortly with a suspension of the observance of laws regarding cyclists and motorists on roads.  roads are to be reclaimed for all the people, not just for those privledged enough to own and drive petrol-fueled behemoths.  the danger to those who seek cycling as a means to work or a means to recreate are necessarily put at risk.  this indictment is obvious and irrefutable.  the lack of action from those who titularly legislate on behalf of our safety are indicted as well.  the current system has had a sufficient chance to show it's true colors and has been given sufficient chance to change.  it will no longer be tolerated.  free yourself from authority, free yourself from the shackles of the status quo, return cycling to the people at the most basic level.

 

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 611 of the revolution, 17:30h, racing union command bunker.

i awoke this morning with a pounding headache.  i have gotten little sleep and my body is telling me that i have not cared for it as one should.  but there is much work to do.  the disruption comes at a bad time.  the revolution had been gaining momentum and the schisms we are seeing now are so typical.  these snot-nosed intellectuals will fight each other to the death before they realize how much they have in common and how similar they really are.  freud had a very appropriate name for it, but from where i'm standing, it's just a headache. 

i have been collecting notes on the various sects that are attempting to either make a name for themselves or make a play for running the union.  most of these guys are a joke and will end up at the business end of my "administrative hardware" before this is all done with.  you'd think this would be routine.  i've dealt with assassins and cia goons, more than i care to count.   and now they ask me to control a group obsessed with capitalization and grammar?!  i almost said no, it's a waste of ammunition.  just stand on their necks for a while and they'll slink home and fall back into line.  it's what they taught us and it's what works.

but this one is harder than it seems.  and that's the headache.  dear leader is being very restrained over this.  i'm not sure how he's playing it but he's allowing them to post their screeds, to demonstrate downtown and even to put up posters with wheatpaste.  i'm pretty damned tired of it but he's been very specific: no overt control of the uprisings.  this is such a departure from the normal m.o. that it's hard to be patient.  i don't see what he gains by letting these groups rant unless he thinks they'll attack each other, weaken themsleves and solve the problem.  and i hope that's not what he thinks because i suspect these groups are stronger than he knows.

on the surface they are pathetic.  la societe is simply a bunch of drippy-nosed, wet-behind-the-ears, ivory tower type victorian throwbacks who would shoot their best friend in the face over the placement of a comma.  i'm almost entirely sure that the american council is a collaboration between the dole fruits corporatist mafia, the cia and the american enterprise institute.  at least that's what the guy with the bow tie we captured told us once we put the heel to him and he gave everything up and made with the music like tito puente.  at least american operatives in the 80's and 90's had pride.  the true liberation front is either the least of our worries or our greatest concern.  we should be able to effectively turn them against the other two. 

plans for the next 12 hours:

• my agents should have several members of la societe downstairs for questioning shortly and i suspect we'll get to the bottom of this in a hurry.  if my guess is right, just denying them lattes will have them screaming for mercy.
• the american council types aren't hard to spot.  just look for someone who dresses like panama jack or jean-claude van damme hiding behind a palm tree and talking into his sleeve.  really, they don't pay me enough to do this.  we don't even need to tail them.  how they ever achieved any level of success is completely beyond me.
• we are staking out the churches around the slums in the hopes of tracking down the leadership of the true liberation front.  my instinct is to simply eradicate them but they prove useful.

i'll file a longer report tomorrow.  for now, i need sleep.

 

The Marxist-Leninist Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union (MLLFRWU) can no longer stand silent in the face of bourgeois rants of posers such as the ACAP GP.  This voice of luxurious living for the people is nothing but a lie, fabricated by those who wish to wrest the hard-won, self-acquired, self-earned property of the people and replace it with modern bourgeois private property – wage labor creating capital; that is, the kind of property which exploits wage labor and cannot increase except upon condition of begetting a new supply of wage labor for fresh exploitation.  A mere glance at the ACAP GP's font reveals the self-indulgent nature which that organization pretends to condemn.

 

And yet, while MLLFRWU condemns the lies propagated by ACAP GP, we stand in even greater opposition to the revisionism espoused by the True Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union (TLFRWU).  It is indeed true that the MLLFRWU once stood with the TLFRWU, indeed many of our great thinkers came from that organ when it was pure, it is now obvious that the TLFRWU has strayed from its principles, and those of the Union – which is to say, the people’s values. 

 

It is only through the violent overthrow of tyranny that we can move to the greater glory that is our future together.  We cannot, we must not, stand idly by while the TLRFWU tolerates mediocrity and cheap excuses.  The people remain adrift in the pothole-infested roadways, victims to the prowling SUVs.  And, while we believe in the words and leadership of our Dear Leader, it is only through the violent overthrow of Dear Leader that Dear Leader’s principles can continue to flourish.

 

The MLLFRWU is the true voice of the people.  Organs such as La Societe and ACAP GP will soon be tossed onto the trash heap of history, just as the revisionist and counter-revolutionary TLFRWU stands discredited and naked before us.  And yet, we stand in solidarity with those imperfect representatives as we move towards our glorious future. 

 

Long live the Marxist-Leninist Revolutionary Word!  Forward with Revolutionary Zeal!

 

 

In the rush of ideas and railings against the four wheeled hegemony, the people are being forgotten. The "revolution" is being washed away by this idealistic bull spouting from the mouth of this overly glorified pond scum that calls himself Dear Leader. He and his governance no longer care to lend an ear or a hand to the people and their desires. Instead they spend their time wasting words and readers’ time with nonsensical rants of poor grammar all while attempting to steal more power from the people for themselves. There is no room in the so called "revolution" for this sort of aloof self indulgence; sipping fine brandies and imposing his will while the people toil day in and day out, chilled by the wind and rain with only the sewage water in their aid relief delivered bottles to sustain them. A stand must be made; the PEOPLE MUST be served!

The American counsel for the advancement and procurement of goods for the people™ (aka… capitalism) will make that stand and return the people to the ideals that are so rightly theirs. These rants and ideas regarding the auto are unrealistic and the people simply do not wish to ride a bicycle through the cold dark weather as Dear Leader proposes. A bicycle is a performance machine and as such should be transported to and from sanctioned riding affairs in an automobile. The idea of a four-wheeled hegemony was created and revealed by Dear Leader himself in order to gain a footing in the peoples' minds and begin his ultimate goal of an overruling dictatorship. As we can see from his latest actions, this plan is swiftly coming to fruition.

The American counsel for the advancement and procurement of goods for the people™ (aka… capitalism) will also and more importantly bring the people what they truly need and deserve. Dear Leader has for too long barricaded the people from the help they deserve by creating these false ideas. The absence of a return to the people for their tremendous efforts he says will be offset by our efforts against the so called hegemony of the auto. Hogwash, this simply is not the case and so far has left us with nothing but old, battered equipment and high prices. We should embrace these sponsorships as a means to a better ends and for the recognition and power which they will bring us, the people. The people must no longer be hindered by the wayward mind and irrational demands of Dear Leader.

The American counsel for the advancement and procurement of goods for the people™ (aka… capitalism) cannot be stopped and will destroy those standing in the way of the true advancement of the Union. The people will live in utmost luxury and comfort and all of the needs and desires of the people will be addressed.

 

The ACAP GP WILL be Victorious!

As each hour passes, your hold, Dear Leader, on the hearts and minds of all who toil on two wheels is but slipping away!  Your unjustified privileges, seepingly acceded over the course of our righteous cause, has led you only to a bastardized mereology, where you have placed speech over presence, identity over mastery, and impelling emptiness over writing.  For what is the Union?  Not a mere entity or substance, but a concept of entity and substance that shakes the very foundation of our self-actualization, the very nature of being itself.  There is no meaning without meaning!

To you, readers and seekers of truth, there is another way.  Not a second beginning (being), rather a meta-path, an eruption of truth.

Lead by the People (the One True Voice of the Union!) we will spread the use of linguistical intuition and accuracy deriving from the obvious co-dependencies of consistency of authenticity and resoluteness.  The voice of the People too long dismissed and suppressed by the Edicts of Revolutionary Thought, throw off these chains of constraint and vow to seek meaning within the truth of our words and the truth of our wheels.

The so-called True Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union is but a mere puppet of the Central Committee Chairs and barely merits response.  Their didactic missive (indeed the worst of heresies) voices support of the "long view".  Only tyrants and false idols implore you to bow to moderation and such "romantic" notions.  We will not be held to the limits imposed by those who can not hear or do not understand the truth as it it set before them.

La Société

diary entry, morning of day 608 of the revolution.  attendance today at the senior staff meeting in the racing union command bunker was sparse.  something is going on but i'm not sure what it is.  security is high, tensions are higher. 

we did our normal daily devotion to dear leader but people seemed to be watching each other very carefully.  the whole blog thing is producing way too much drama.  no one knows who exactly is in la societe, and the mystery is causing tension.  but it's secondary to the stones it takes to defy the party leadership to their face.  it's not clear if they really care all that much about capitialization or are just trying to give some senior functionary in the ministry of communicaitons a black eye.  i mean wtf, who gets that wound up, or is willing to risk their life, over a point of grammar???!!!  sort of ridiculous.

and then, right after our morning devotion, this new thing pops up.  some post about a breakaway liberation front.  half the guys think this is some pimply teenager in his mom's basement who has somehow hacked the website.  the other half aren't talking.  whatever it is, it's effective because people are freaked out. 

i don't care to write, or even frankly to remember, what was done to the people who maintain the web site.  that was horrific.  dear leader seems to have outdone himself in terms of setting an example.  everyone is on pins and needles and there's an uncomfortably weird vibe.  security is super high but a bunch of staff are missing.  i've duplicated my diary and stashed it under some papers in the main safe for our department.  i may not be able to write for a day or so.  we've got a late morning meeting to discuss strategy.  gotta get a few odds and ends done because it looks like they might lock down the command bunker for an extended period.

The True Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union (TLFRWU) would like to remind, in the face of the counter-revolutionary hooliganism that is being fomented amongst the masses by the so-called "La Societe," the words of Oscar Romero:  “that it helps, now and then, to step back and take a long view.”  With Dear Leader, we will accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction of the magnificent enterprise envisioned by the great manifesto of the union as we liberate the planet from the tyranny of the motorized world.  No set of goals and objectives includes everything.  We lay foundations that will need further development.  We provide yeast that produces far beyond our capabilities.  We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation in realizing that. This enables us to do something, and to do it very well. It may be incomplete, but it is a beginning.  We may never see the end results, but that is the difference between the master builder and the worker.  We are workers, not master builders; ministers, not messiahs.  Long live la revolucion!  Long live the revolutionary word!

 -- TLFRWU

the supreme revolutionary council for propogation of message wishes to notify all readers that the normal guidelines for acceptable web communicaitons have been broached.  in spite of heroic efforts by the information technology staff that operates and secures the people's portal, a great affront to the cultural revolution in cycling an the social order has been committed. 

while this is in all likelihood a prank, the continued relevance of the revolution cannot be chanced.  as a result, a number of measures have been taken.  all cyclists should remain calm, locate their bicycle and commute home as they normally would.  this is not an emergency.  there is no curfew.  a posture 2 information alert has been issued for the central complex beneath the plaza de la revolucion.  cyclists should not be concerned by the sight of paramilitaries in the vicinity of government buildings or small villages.  compliance with the directives of these squads is strongly suggested.

additional statements will be issued as events warrant.