free your mind and your ass will follow

http://wamu.org/audio/kn/07/09/k1070903-17511.asx

hugs and kisses,
the new velo anarcho-syndicalists

dear leader's daily thought: a simple meditation or anecdote to bring the principles of revolution into better focus.
day 619 of the revolution
distribution list: racing union intranet
classification: open for redistribution
respond to: dear_leader@racingunion.org

many who follow the path and ponder the nature of revolution are sincere in their pursuit of knowledge.  their belief is robust and though they question to seek knowledge, they do not question their fundamental beliefs concerning the relationships between society, work, bikes and productivity.  this forms the backbone of an important distinction: those who question to seek knowledge and those who question to debase an argument or insert doubt where none should exist.

just the other day, while engaging in a vigorous debate with some capitalists outside the chicago mercantile exchange, one of them attempted to set a rhetorical trap for me.  having read the recent puff piece on my life and thoughts in esquire magazine, he observed that my course of studies as a student had a heavy focus on evolutionary biology.  he further posited that my college experience had been wasted, or that i was not up to the task of understanding the material.  his argument developed from a thesis that charles darwin sought to communciate: that nature is a vast optimizing system.  relentlessly cruel, ruthlessly efficient, life is a constant struggle.  slight variations on a genetic motif compete endlessly, and over what seems like an infinite number of generations, those with slight advantages should produce more progeny and squeeze out the those who are considered less fit.

this man went on to imply that financial markets are very much the same.  many individuals are involved in constantly re-evaluating the market: pricing stocks, paying for goods.  only those companies that can most effectively compete, can succeed.  and in that sense, they must be the most fit.  his point elliptically came around to the view that one could not simultaneously support a view embracing evolution and denigrating the free market.  this man must be assumed to have had some formal training in debate, for though his argument were shot full of holes, he delivered them with stunning eloquence and a great many passersby were convinced by the mere tone of his presentation.  but true revolutionaries always validate any message they receive against a simple set of principles.  one need not fall down the rabbit hole of circumlocution.

the most obvious problem with the man's thesis is that evolution and markets operate on a completely different basis and scale.  to help illustrate this, one need only investigate possible analogs.  One might, for instance, compare the concept from wealth of philanthropy and the biological concept of altruism.  the similarity seems paradoxical to someone who has not pondered the true nature of each activity.  when dealing with wealth under a truly capitalist mindset, any loss of capital is a loss of "fitness".  however, under the dawkins model of the level at which evolution occurs, altruism can actually benefit the gene at the cost of the individual.  revolutionaries true to the manifesto must realize that anyone arguing from the principle that maximizing personal return at the cost of others will be doing so on the backs of something else or someone else.  without getting too far into the complexities of distributions, there are clearly finite resources to go around, so anyone seeking to maximize their own share is by definition seeking to alter a distribution from approaching equality.  the more they seek to extract, the more inequality results: inequality is a direct function of greed.

what's needed is a rising tide that truly floats all boats, not just lip service about the benefits of an ownership society.  once the basic needs of all have been ministered to, other expenditures can be contemplated.  but to bring this back to the original analogy, capitalism is better understood, though biological metaphor, as parasitism: where attempts are made to extract the maximum which does not kill the provider.  avoid this kind of thinking at all costs when those who are not supportive of the revolution push it on you.

note: you are receiving this email because you have expressed interest in items of a revolutionary nature.  if you would prefer not to receive the wisdom of dear leader, please submit an email to this address with a detailed explanation of why such email is not warmly received.  you should expect an in-person "response" within several hours from one of our citizen service staff.  they tend to be prompt and efficient.

for immediate distribution

from: the people's ministry for propogation of message,
supreme revolutionary council for change in cycling and the social order
day 618 of the revolution

this outake is from remarks delivered by dear leader during an extemporaneous speech on the occasion of the american labor day about how personal sacrifice through financial austerity aids the revolution and your fellow revolutionaries. the majority of the speech focuses on how the current hardship must give way to progress and how all must share the burden. the full speech had a duration of 2 hours and 53 minutes and was delivered from the people's podium on the plaza de la revolucion to wild applause and cheering.

<start of exerpt>

...my friends and fellow revolutionaries, you have heard much recently from groups who would pick up the mantle of leadership and run with it.  many, it seems, would seek to illuminate faults with the way the union is led.  but i say to you, and i appeal to your common sense and wisdom, that while it's easy to find fault, it's quite a different thing to lead a union as mighty, as well respected and as amazing as this union of racers.

<applause>

you may see their posters around town, or their electronic bulletin board messages on the tubes.  quite impressive, some of it, with graphics and slogans and fancy french names.  and they talk a lot.  you know i'm a revolutionary who likes to talk a lot as well...

<laughter>

...yes, yes, you are correct, i probably go on too long, but i will not apologize, as it is motivated by love for the revolution and fondness for my fellow revolutionaries.  but i am going to surprise you yet again my friends.  i hold no grudge against these petit revolutionaries.  it is plain to see that there has been no crack down, no armed struggle, no juntas hunting these people down.  they have been granted every liberty so that you may judge their words on the merits.  you know this is true.  from the hills where the campesinos work and labor, to the towns where tradesmen honor us all with their fine artisanal work and crafts, there has been no crack down, no police state, there has been no boot coming down.  these petit revolutionaries, who hide in the shadows and post screeds about those who labor under a heavy yoke to make life for cyclists easier, it is they who are not being respectful.  they are allowed their freedom, and we have all listed to them.  what sort of revolutionaries would we be if we did not listen to our peers.  and yet what solutions have they offered?  capitalize our letters?  get a 401k?  are they serious?

<crowd cheers agreement>

as you commute to work tomorrow, dodging automobiles and desperately attempting to make ends meet, consider their proposals and ask who better understands the place of the people and the needs of the people?  to say that freedom is as simple as a particular use of grammar should be your first indication that you are not dealing with someone who will stand beside you in the heat of battle.  you need a leader who will carry you on his shoulders when you cannot walk, who will share your suffering, join you at the plow as the fields are tilled, join you in the yoke as the goods are carried to market.  you need leaders who will sacrifice everything

<applause>

there is a need to work together to make do with less.  the times are hard and i can assure you that every spare moment and every spare revolutionary ruble is being used to further the interests of the people.  times are hard, but hard times make hard people. 

<murmurs of approval>

i want to assure you that i am working very hard to be sure that no decadence exists if we ask a single worker to suffer.  all are committed to the cause and the effort.  for we move on boldly, showing others by the example of our actions, that alternative systems don't just function, or even function effectively, but are superior.  every time we lift a hammer to strike a blow, we do so with extra strength, extra care and extra focus, because we know we must work twice as hard as the lazy and complacent to demonstrate the superiority of our belief and approach.  each task must be completed, not just well, but in an exemplary manner, as a single slip or flaw will be used by our enemies to tarnish the remainder of our work....

...and it is for this reason that patience and austerity seem so difficult.  at this time, when we must expect and must extract the utmost from each worker, it seems hardest to make do with least.  i can only ask you to trust me and to trust your fellow cyclists and citizens with whom your share your struggle.  we have been with you all along the way and will continue along with you.  though conditions favor us, the crucible of current conditions is hard.  yet we know that we shall make it through: stronger, better, and the voctory will be all the sweeter.  huzzah union forces!

<crowd cheers agreement>

<end of exerpt>

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 618 of the revolution, 14:30h, an untended corn field on the west peninsula.

early this morning, we found the automobile dear leader was reported to have left the compound in.  reports had him with three companions, travelling at an exceedingly high rate of speed, but none of the companions are present here.  i had the initial accident team fan out to look for them, and anyone who might have run into them with plans to keep this very quiet.  very, very quiet.

when we arrived on the scene, the car was upside down, the engine was still revving, the high beams on, and spanish moon was blaring from the speakers.  a 76 foot patch of rubber pointed down the road and through a curve to where we found it.  contents of the car: seven cigars, cuban; one and a half bottles of what appear to be kentucky, single-barrel bourbon; two blankets; 7 pieces of jerked chicken along with two large containers of rice and beans; a briefcase with a two cell phones, a pistol, loaded, and a half finished speech for the american labor day about "how personal sacrifice through financial austerity aids the revolution and your fellow revolutionaries".  there were a lot fo marks on the speech but it was dark and i had other things to focus on.  finally, a selection of 1970's era cassette tapes: foghat, bad company, little feat and early zz top.  i was unaware that copies of these tapes were in circulation.  they are not banned but they are rare and most would consider them exotic.  the cassettes had labels such as "saying of chairman mao", "speeches of hugo chavez" and "biography of huey newton". 

these facts are itemized not so much to document the scene as to provide subsequent insight into what might be motivating these bizarre episodes of behaviour.  clearly the strain is getting to everyone, but dear leader appears to be showing some major cracks.  he was found face down, but concious and alert in a ditch nearby.  he ignored all efforts to communcate, other than to hum a tune and mumble some lyrics.  one guard thought he recognized it as coming from a band called .38 special, but on hearing this, dear lead rose, walked over to the man and assaulted him.  He was forcibly restrained and then medicated and taken to his summer residence.

the real concern here is not dear leader.  the party can certainly replace him, and his behaviour is leading many to find him emminently more replaceable.  the problem is control.  the supreme revolutionary guard is rapidly losing patience.  these are the type of people that don't like uncertainty and loathe chaos.  if a power vaccuum emerges, they will fill it quickly and with force.  that transition would be.....sub-optimal.....and must be avoided if at all possible.  a coup may be necessary, but the goons cannot be allowed to run things.  i had dear leader's shelby cobra GT500 towed to my personal chalet where it will undergo repairs and restoration.  in the name of the people, of course, as it is the property of the people.  I divided up the cigars and booze for the guards who were very grateful.

i notified the ministries of communcations, outreach and central planning.  as of this writing, i believe the whole incident has been put to bed.

 

link.  click it now.

I write this post to you all to let you know despite comrade Chuega’s claims that the ACAP GP has scattered for the cover of our off shore supporters the Council still remains incognito within the ranks of Dear Leaders own command bunker. There has been a bit of sniffing around but luckily we early on managed to fool the rest of the Union into believing those decoys placed around the compound in seer-sucker suits and ray bans where the force of the council.

 

At this point we are very close to a break through against DL and his oppressive regime. The chemicals we have gradual released into his personal air supply has begun it’s work; just this morning I witnessed blood coming from his nose and the watery, red eyes that mean the chemicals have begun their work on the old mans body. It should only be a matter of days, if not hours before DL will be left helpless to defend himself and his regime.

 

Things are quite tight here now so I must keep this short. Remember, God will carry us through this as if on eagles’ wings and the people will be free for once and for all. Long live the American counsel for the advancement and procurement of goods for the people™ (aka… capitalism)!

 

 

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 613 of the revolution, 21:07h, guard complex, north perimeter of the plaza de la revolucion.

i just got back from a personal audience with maximum leader.  my report was simple.  the people's liberation front and the marxist leninist liberation front have been driven underground and have not been heard from since friday.  we suspect they have scattered amongst the hills and will likely be sheltered by the clergy, at least in the short term.  they cannot be broken if they cannot be caught, but if victory for them is hiding in some poor campesino's root cellar to keep their counter-revolution going, then huzzah for them, let them have endless victory in the root cellar.

the capitalists have also gone underground.  we had intelligence of them fleeing en masse to the u.s. embassy and the central port where various multinational industries got them off shore and onto container ships.  good riddance, though speaking as a military man, i'd take enemies like that any day.  too laughable to be dangerous, except to themselves.  they will undoubtedly run home with their tales between their legs and tell the important politicians that some great bogeyman is interfering with "the trade".  that always seems to precede people getting hurt, but we'll need to deal with the headache later.  the port's still open and operating so it's not like the 101st airborne will be parachuting in.

la societe and the anarchists are a different story.  we have no progress on that front.  the anarchists started smashing storefronts and looting.  their destruction is so random that it's difficult to stay ahead of.  you can't plan for it or control it, you can only cordon them off in a vague sense and seek to limit the damage.  la societe is a question mark.  they have covered their tracks very well.  i have all my resources on the street focused on them, not so much for action as to get an understadning of their true motives and goals.  capitalization?!  please...  this is likely about power or money or privledge.  we'll know soon enough.

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 612 of the revolution, 23:30h, racing union command bunker.

 

my sources dragged in a kid and a laptop.  he was all set to post some screed to the web portal when our phone tap caught him.  they yanked him out of the basement so fast he didn't know what hit him.  he was a wreck, and i don't mean because the security detail "tenderized" him.  he was equal parts stupid defiance and abject terror.  i tried to calm him down and ask him questions but he seemed convinced that talking was a bad option.  so i laid it out in a clear and lucid manner for him.  the whole pretentious, coffee house intellectual, goatee wearing revolutionary thing has been done.  and it went exactly nowhere.  and now, you're a very small person incarcerated in a very large and scary facility.  at this point, you have two, and only two, options.  you can tell us everything we want to know, at which point you may return to your family knowing that we are monitoring you and them, forget revolution and do something productive, or you can have the information extracted from you forcibly, and this will come with a very high price.  he got indignant, and did a really nice soliloquy on my oppressive tactics.  i never get tired of lectures from sanctimonious revolutionaries trying to run it down for me.  i've probably heard that speech several hundred times and i'm always amused.  after that, we "tenderized" him for about ten minutes.  at this point, he had an epiphany about where he really was at this point in his life and what his options were.  and he decided, on his own, smart boy, that he wanted to make a contribution to our maintenance of an orderly society.  hasta la victoria siempre...

he wasn't part of one of the established groups that is constantly posting nonsense, but appears to be some sort of basement job with a permanent hard on for the little lenin library.  i was obviously mistaken about how serious a threat these people are.  they are a joke.  we should simply parade this one with his laptop and no pants through the streets so people get some sort fo idea what these revolutionaries really are.  dear leader's restaint on this matter was prescient.  he continues to impress me, and is likely either the wisest revolutionary in 300 years or the luckiest despot in the history of mankind.  we should have two of these groups in leg shackles by lunch tomorrow.

The age of Dear Leader and the chaos (anarchy!) he has birthed upon the Union struggles now with its last death throes, muttering to itself one nonsensical utterance after another, leaving the path for the new order of truths to open and blossom in an episteme of cycling. As our consciousness shifts from one point to another, we are again guided by the simple beauty and grace of words reflecting meaning, meaning embodied in language, language shared among brothers, and brothers sharing words, all with simple illocutionary acts. Acts supported by mere capitals!

You may ask, "But must we start a revolution all over again?" The inevitable answer is "Mais oui, sans pitié!"

The pretenders are many. The MLLFRWU's beginnings were promising, but their moral barrenness reveals itself in their openly nihilistic writings proclaiming the meaninglessness and absence of content of creation The [N]ew [V]elo [A]narcho-[S]yndicalists are the newest aspirants for cycling domination, now engaged in resurrecting the theory and practice of absolute and immediate incomprehensibility to large masses of people. The ACAP GP, as others have rightly (and righteously) criticized, is perhaps the last rampart of the bourgeoisie. And the Unholy Rouleur, pecking at the table scraps left over, has no fear of the gaping abyss which separates him from the spiritual life of the people.

Despite these obstacles, The People's revolution rolls forth, and the hatemongers and all their angels cannot prevail against it. Our statement here, our enunciated "speech acts", weave a network of conditions required for continued existence and the search for truth in the wheel. You cannot change the natural evolution of society by a command; you may make a resolution to write only what everybody likes, but you cannot force real revolutionaries to descend to the lowest possible standards to give up morals, character, and sincerity, to avoid capitalization and punctuation. Our power is created and transferred throughout an economy of discourse not race reimbursements, coasting not only through conduits of dialog, but through our very streets!

La Société

statement by the new velo anarcho-syndicalists:

true freedom doesn't flow from a manifesto, and it sure as hell doesn't flow from the words or actions of leaders, elected or otherwise.  if you want change, you must make change.  this is so simple, it's sort of curious that it's so often overlooked.  if you want something new, you make something new.  social structures have tremendous inertia and change is difficult.  one who studies physics comes to understand the tremendous amount of energy input that is required to alter the inertia of a large stationary object or system.  we draw from this example, and indicate that we will bring a huge, raw amount of energy to change the social status quo.

we are told, by people who are considered moderate and reasonable, that politely advocating a change of course, and then politlely sitting around and waiting for legislators to make our lives easier is the proper course of action.  we are done with this.  the roads are entirely too dangerous for cylists.  we need change now, and we are prepared to cause change. 

some may be unhappy with the pressures that will be brought to bear in order to produce change.  that's fine.  many are unhappy now, with the current means of production and with the current propogation of a serfdom-like system revolving around credit and debt.  many workers, literally chained to work through financial instruments of bondage, are unable to ever work beyond the need for work.  so think of what's coming as a shift in terms of who is going to be unhappy.

direct action starts very shortly with a suspension of the observance of laws regarding cyclists and motorists on roads.  roads are to be reclaimed for all the people, not just for those privledged enough to own and drive petrol-fueled behemoths.  the danger to those who seek cycling as a means to work or a means to recreate are necessarily put at risk.  this indictment is obvious and irrefutable.  the lack of action from those who titularly legislate on behalf of our safety are indicted as well.  the current system has had a sufficient chance to show it's true colors and has been given sufficient chance to change.  it will no longer be tolerated.  free yourself from authority, free yourself from the shackles of the status quo, return cycling to the people at the most basic level.

 

personal diary of hector ortiz chuega, current head of dear leader's security detail, day 611 of the revolution, 17:30h, racing union command bunker.

i awoke this morning with a pounding headache.  i have gotten little sleep and my body is telling me that i have not cared for it as one should.  but there is much work to do.  the disruption comes at a bad time.  the revolution had been gaining momentum and the schisms we are seeing now are so typical.  these snot-nosed intellectuals will fight each other to the death before they realize how much they have in common and how similar they really are.  freud had a very appropriate name for it, but from where i'm standing, it's just a headache. 

i have been collecting notes on the various sects that are attempting to either make a name for themselves or make a play for running the union.  most of these guys are a joke and will end up at the business end of my "administrative hardware" before this is all done with.  you'd think this would be routine.  i've dealt with assassins and cia goons, more than i care to count.   and now they ask me to control a group obsessed with capitalization and grammar?!  i almost said no, it's a waste of ammunition.  just stand on their necks for a while and they'll slink home and fall back into line.  it's what they taught us and it's what works.

but this one is harder than it seems.  and that's the headache.  dear leader is being very restrained over this.  i'm not sure how he's playing it but he's allowing them to post their screeds, to demonstrate downtown and even to put up posters with wheatpaste.  i'm pretty damned tired of it but he's been very specific: no overt control of the uprisings.  this is such a departure from the normal m.o. that it's hard to be patient.  i don't see what he gains by letting these groups rant unless he thinks they'll attack each other, weaken themsleves and solve the problem.  and i hope that's not what he thinks because i suspect these groups are stronger than he knows.

on the surface they are pathetic.  la societe is simply a bunch of drippy-nosed, wet-behind-the-ears, ivory tower type victorian throwbacks who would shoot their best friend in the face over the placement of a comma.  i'm almost entirely sure that the american council is a collaboration between the dole fruits corporatist mafia, the cia and the american enterprise institute.  at least that's what the guy with the bow tie we captured told us once we put the heel to him and he gave everything up and made with the music like tito puente.  at least american operatives in the 80's and 90's had pride.  the true liberation front is either the least of our worries or our greatest concern.  we should be able to effectively turn them against the other two. 

plans for the next 12 hours:

• my agents should have several members of la societe downstairs for questioning shortly and i suspect we'll get to the bottom of this in a hurry.  if my guess is right, just denying them lattes will have them screaming for mercy.
• the american council types aren't hard to spot.  just look for someone who dresses like panama jack or jean-claude van damme hiding behind a palm tree and talking into his sleeve.  really, they don't pay me enough to do this.  we don't even need to tail them.  how they ever achieved any level of success is completely beyond me.
• we are staking out the churches around the slums in the hopes of tracking down the leadership of the true liberation front.  my instinct is to simply eradicate them but they prove useful.

i'll file a longer report tomorrow.  for now, i need sleep.

 

The Marxist-Leninist Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union (MLLFRWU) can no longer stand silent in the face of bourgeois rants of posers such as the ACAP GP.  This voice of luxurious living for the people is nothing but a lie, fabricated by those who wish to wrest the hard-won, self-acquired, self-earned property of the people and replace it with modern bourgeois private property – wage labor creating capital; that is, the kind of property which exploits wage labor and cannot increase except upon condition of begetting a new supply of wage labor for fresh exploitation.  A mere glance at the ACAP GP's font reveals the self-indulgent nature which that organization pretends to condemn.

 

And yet, while MLLFRWU condemns the lies propagated by ACAP GP, we stand in even greater opposition to the revisionism espoused by the True Liberation Front of the Revolutionary Word of the Union (TLFRWU).  It is indeed true that the MLLFRWU once stood with the TLFRWU, indeed many of our great thinkers came from that organ when it was pure, it is now obvious that the TLFRWU has strayed from its principles, and those of the Union – which is to say, the people’s values. 

 

It is only through the violent overthrow of tyranny that we can move to the greater glory that is our future together.  We cannot, we must not, stand idly by while the TLRFWU tolerates mediocrity and cheap excuses.  The people remain adrift in the pothole-infested roadways, victims to the prowling SUVs.  And, while we believe in the words and leadership of our Dear Leader, it is only through the violent overthrow of Dear Leader that Dear Leader’s principles can continue to flourish.

 

The MLLFRWU is the true voice of the people.  Organs such as La Societe and ACAP GP will soon be tossed onto the trash heap of history, just as the revisionist and counter-revolutionary TLFRWU stands discredited and naked before us.  And yet, we stand in solidarity with those imperfect representatives as we move towards our glorious future. 

 

Long live the Marxist-Leninist Revolutionary Word!  Forward with Revolutionary Zeal!